Feeling

Feeling Fully: Emotions, Needs, and Nonviolent Communication

In the world of remote work, personal growth, and global connection, emotional honesty is more important than ever. But being honest about our emotions isn’t always easy. Sometimes, we don’t have the words. Sometimes, we feel too vulnerable. Sometimes, we just don’t know what we’re feeling.

That’s where Nonviolent Communication (NVC), created by Marshall Rosenberg, can help.

NVC teaches us to connect with ourselves and others through four basic steps:

1. Observation – What happened, without judgment?

2. Feelings – How do I feel about it?

3. Needs – What universal need is alive in me?

4. Request – What would make life more wonderful right now?

This process might sound simple, but it takes practice. One of the hardest parts? Naming our feelings.

We often say, “I’m fine” or “I’m stressed” without going deeper. But Rosenberg believed we could create more peace, connection, and empathy when we use specific emotional vocabulary.

Let’s look at a few examples.

Feelings Vocabulary (Intermediate)

When your needs are met, you might feel…

• Peaceful

• Grateful

• Excited

• Energized

• Comfortable

• Relaxed

• Curious

• Inspired

• Proud

• Safe

When your needs are not met, you might feel…

• Frustrated

• Disappointed

• Lonely

• Anxious

• Tired

• Overwhelmed

• Guilty

• Embarrassed

• Confused

• Irritated

Needs Vocabulary (Universal Human Needs)

According to NVC, all human beings share the same basic needs, even if we try to meet them in different ways. Some common needs are:

• Belonging

• Autonomy (freedom to choose)

• Rest

• Understanding

• Support

• Play

• Safety

• Connection

• Purpose

• Respect

When we get clear about our feelings and needs, we can communicate in a way that brings people closer—rather than pushing them away.

Why This Matters

In relationships, at work, in families, or on Zoom calls with colleagues in other countries, emotional intelligence helps us stay connected.

When someone says, “You’re not listening,” we might react. But if they say, “I feel disconnected and I really need more clarity, can we try again?” — the conversation changes. There is room to listen and respond with care.

Learning to express emotions clearly can help us:

• Build trust

• Reduce conflict

• Stay calm in hard conversations

• Understand others more deeply

• Care for our own well-being

It doesn’t mean we’ll always agree—but we’ll understand each other more, and that’s a kind of peace.

Conversation Questions (Intermediate Level)

1. How do you usually express your emotions—in words, actions, or silence?

2. Can you name a time when you felt really understood? What helped?

3. What emotions are easy for you to share? Which ones are harder?

4. In your language or culture, how do people talk about their needs and feelings?

5. How could using NVC help in your work, friendships, or family?

6. Try this: Think of a recent situation that was stressful. What did you feel? What need was not met?

7. Do you think it’s easier to express emotions in your first language or in English? Why?