Caring for the Elders in Your Life - Ayurveda & the Mind
Updated: Feb 8
Eldership. What does it mean to you? To me it is carrying the Community. Holding each other up. Teaching and steering and weaving by example. Teach to Learn One of my Teachers Babaji (Baba Hari Dass) said.
I haven’t lived near my parents since 1994. When I started to write this it was with my Mom in mind and then it became a symphony of my Life. The symphony for which I am so grateful::: I am so thankful to have you all in my big glowing vibrant Community. She was with me last December and when I went to hug her and hold her like I did to my son she sat awkwardly, ignorant to what true love looks like. Let’s show the World::: breathing the dream awake 😌
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Here is a poem I am feeling called to share followed by a discussion about Love & Elders & I guess ultimately Eldership for we are all Elders in training.
𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲, 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫.
𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲
𝐨𝐫 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐨𝐭 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬
𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚𝐧 𝐮𝐧𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐞𝐠𝐠.
𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲, 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐫.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐱𝐞𝐬
𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬
𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐬
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲.
𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲, 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐟𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐬
𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮
𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐬.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐲𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫
𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝.
𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲, 𝐛𝐨𝐬𝐬.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬
𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐨𝐦.
𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲, 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐬
𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐝𝐨𝐠𝐦𝐚𝐬.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡
𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐧
𝐓𝐨 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐈𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬
𝐓𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐧
𝐓𝐨 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬, 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐬
𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭
𝐓𝐨 𝐫𝐮𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐰𝐨𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐬
𝐓𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐭
𝐓𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐧 𝐛𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐦
𝐓𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧
𝐓𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐞𝐩
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐲
𝐓𝐨 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡
𝐌𝐮𝐝 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬
𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐬 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐭
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐣𝐮𝐦𝐩 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐲𝐬𝐬.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐬
𝐓𝐨 𝐝𝐨 𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐬
𝐓𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐲
𝐓𝐨 𝐠𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞
𝐓𝐨 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐜
𝐓𝐨 𝐭𝐨𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐦𝐲𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠
𝐓𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐰
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐭
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐲
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡
𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐥𝐲
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞
𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭
𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠
𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐠𝐨 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠
𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐩 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥
𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐞
𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐦𝐞
𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐚 𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐱.
𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐧
𝐓𝐨 𝐛𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐮𝐩 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐬
𝐓𝐨 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐮𝐩 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧
𝗪𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐨𝐥𝐝
𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐬
𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐞.
𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞, 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲
Why is it that the older generation doesn’t let us love them?
And is that ok?
How do we manage that?
What is the form of love?
How many shapes does it have?
What lessons are in that for me?
The beauty of being able to love someone up so completely and fully is such a wonderous gift to your own soul. Do you even know what that love feels like to give or to receive. Are you interested? If so, then let’s explore how to get there!
What is pure love and how do we recognize it if we are newbies? It’s the love you feel for an animal or a plant or that thing you are passionate about. It’s that thing we exude naturally and effortlessly that if you were to look at yourself from outside yourself you are just glowing. It’s like a mother who is in loves love. Its so pure bc the beings involved are pure.
Steps to get to pure love :
◆ Purify purify purify. Keep following your passions until that shininess comes back to your aura/ to your Soul/ to your Eyes
◆ Find your heart. Then express it while respecting their boundaries and your own And Let them find their own way. A person Of experience will watch you and learn from you, just like a child.
◆ Breathe in acceptance of the situation. Practice this. Use meditation, yoga, counseling, surfing, rituals etc to get to this
◆ Apply discipline. From experience this takes hours a day. The more dense your energy the more you have taken on up until this point the more time you need to pass cleansing.
◆ Call in community and ritual. Communicate and connect with high vibrational and intentional beings if they are available, if not that’s ok too; maybe you can find an online Community, or nature, or your higher self. Work with an Ayurvedic Practitioner to guide you on how to support the Elders in your life. This will only help you later too:::
if any is this resonates with you please research some more about angry and irrational elders online. It’s not personal, it can be soothed. When you do your inner work and treat yourself as sacred, acting from a place of authenticity and integrity the rest naturally works out. Do your best. The Universe supports you.
Understanding Aging and the Personality changes that come with it:
In Ayurveda speak, the wind element of entering the Vata phase of life can cause imbalances to intensify and spread. If a person had an out of balance Pitta aggravation ie. Was prone to anger, frustration, or irritation or other Pitta symptoms then these can see an increase as the Vata element of wind spreads and fans the fire...Another example is that a person may become demanding and difficult. If the person was Vata predominant then they may be prone to memory loss and dementia as they age. Lifestyle and diet help! Do your inner work and Consult an Ayurvedic Practitioner is my advice.
Some things you can actively do to support the Elders in your Life:
◆ Apply Compassion. An elder has often had to deal with many issues including changing family circles, loss, health issues, and so much more.
◆ Acceptance, inclusion. The kindest thing you can do is hold space for them and love them exactly as they are. This is a natural part of life. You can also show the children what it means to love unconditionally.
◆ Respect & boundaries are the keystone to any relationship. See if you can see what your elders underlying issues may be and see if you can help them satisfy those. Be clear about any boundaries you have.
◆ Model good behaviour and set up supports to make sure the elders in your life and you are supported.
◆Trust Life. Help the people around you by building up their self esteem. Let go of expectations.
◆ and of course, one of the main pilars of spirituality today: forgive fast, forget easily, and live in the moment. The journey is always inward. The past is over and done. Being resentful and holding grudges keeps people stuck. Cross all bridges with joy.
◆ Be willing to change. Be willing to release negative thoughts.
◆ Do your inner work, see the section above on getting to Pure Love
As people move into that elder phase of life at their own pace it can be helpful to observe and get the advice of an Ayurvedic Practitioner. Diet & Lifestyle can change anyone’s life.
Many people are harshest to the people they care the most about so if you shift your perspective you can see how much they appreciate you. And manage your insides, everything starts and ends with You. You can only help someone if you help yourself. Give yourself the support you need so you can shine even brighter 🌞 You have my utmost respect. Feel free to reach out for support.
🌿 Online & In Person Yoga Classes
🌿 Ayurvedic Consulations and Coaching
🌿 Custom Tropical Retreats
🌿 Physical Therapy (incl. massage & yoga therapy)
~*~*~*~ 𝗪𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐜 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐞 ~*~*~*~
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